looking back.

As I reflect back on 2010, I cannot even believe everything that has happened. Many memories flood my mind, and I realize how much I've changed as well. I graduated high school in 2010, which was pretty crazy. I got one of the main roles acting in the youth show, which I had so much fun with, and I absolutely loved the message of the show, and the fact that I could relate. Then taking that show on tour was just so exciting to me. We had a really fun beach week for the most part, and stayed up way too late. I got to go to Brazil yet again, and I felt at peace and just so happy. I am so blessed to get that opportunity to go twice and impact so many lives. I had the best/most fun summers of my life, and got to spend it with the best people in the world. I started college, which was insane. I am completely my own person and have all the independence in the world. I've made some of the best friends and I absolutely love it there. It is like two different worlds when I come home and when I'm there. I am so thankful that I love them both. I also look back at realize that I am such a different person than I was when I started the year. I am so much stronger than I ever would have even imagined. God has put me through some of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with in my life, but I look back at it now and realize just how strong I am. Also, I feel like I've become more compassionate towards others, or at least I try to. Once college started, I've tried my hardest to not judge others and love and accept them just the way they are. I love college because it really does give you every opportunity to be whoever you want to be. This year has been one of the greatest years of my life, but at the same time it's been one of the hardest. God has shown me that I have to be thankful and happy with the good things in my life, and not reflect so much on the bad. I hope to continue to do this in 2011. 2011, I hope you're more than I could imagine! :)

happy girl.

Oh today was so pleasant. Well, my friends, I finally have a Canon Rebel! I got a lot of money and gift cards for presents for Christmas, so I decided I was finally going to get this camera...I've wanted it for four years but it always made me sick to my stomach to even think about spending hundreds of dollars on it. But, I finally did it...and I cannot be happier! I LOVE this thing! I've been playing around with it all day! I am also really, really blessed to be able to have it and be able to afford it. Tonight was fabulous because I got to hang out with my best friend, Kim. We watched He's Just Not That in to You, which was really good. Then we basically talked forever and everything under the sun and ate some yummy food. I miss hanging out and doing nothing but having long, good talks. But, it makes me even more thankful for them when they do happen! I just love her! :)

I just finished watching Letters to Juliet and I love movies like this and hate them at the same time. I love them because I am a helpless romantic...in all seriousness. I know I don't seem like one ever, because I never share that. But I imagine everything under the sun. And I believe in fairytales, whether I should or not. I hate them because I can't help but wonder where is that guy. Now I'm not trying to sound dramatic like I have to have one in my life or I'm going to die or anything, because it's not like that. I just wonder when I watch these movies where is he. I wish life was like the movies and I would magically have a guy and we fall in love and live happily ever after. But this is not my life. I was telling someone this the other night, and it is my greatest fear. I am afraid that I am never going to get married...it literally terrifies me. No, I'm not afraid of getting shot or killed or drowning or anything like that. Just that I will be alone. If you're reading this I am not looking for pity or for you to tell me that there are guys that like me and so on, because it is not that at all. I am simply expressing my greatest fear, and I am not fishing for compliments. It just scares me. I'm afraid that I won't find anyone or no one will want to marry me. I know this may sound silly, but that honestly is my one greatest fear. And these movies make me wish for something that I'm afraid will never be...

christmas eve!

Oh goodness, it's Christmas Eve! How lovely! I spent the night last night at my grandparent's house and we celebrated Christmas today with them and my mom's side of the family. We opened gifts, and I got a lot of gift cards and some money! No longer a broke college kid...that is unless I buy something that I've wanted for years now...a Canon Rebel camera! They are SO expensive though. I've wanted one for soooo long and I would love to take millions of pictures and become a better photographer. But, I will be broke once again. So, do I buy this camera and be really really broke, or do I keep all this money and make life a little bit easier on me when I go back to school?! This, I do not know. I just got really sidetracked. Oh well. It was nice to be with the family and enjoy some time together. My mom and I are back at home now though. Elsbeth came over to get her gift, and so that she could give me mine. The little owl is presh! :) I was supposed to go meet Chandler so he could give me his present to me, but my mom wouldn't let me out. So, instead he sent me a picture of it. It's a photoshopped picture of me, him, and Jesse from Brazil and I love it! I love pictures in general. Now I believe I am going to watch Charlie St. Cloud and stay quarnentined in my room because Santa is tired and wants to go to sleep, and I'm not allowed out. Tehehe. Merry Christmas Eve lovelies! :D

break!

Wow. So it's officially winter break for me! I don't think I've really wrapped my mind around the fact that I'm going to be home for an entire month. It's kind of crazy...I love it...yet, I already miss LC. Hmph. No matter where I am, I'm always missing people. GRRR! But today was a good last day at school. I packed for an entire month (in which I brought wayyy too much stuff...Taylor tried making me pick between stuff because he said I didn't need it all...but I still ended up taking way too much. Haha.) Then me, Taylor, and Mary went to lunch and shopping at the bookstore. I then departed to come back home. I just hung out for a while when I was home...I missed being at home. Then me, Josh, Julie, and Destry went to Bottoms Up (delish!!) for dinner. Afterwards, we ran around downtown to get to our cars because it was so freezing and then went to Julie's and played lots of water pong. I missed downtown RVA so much...it felt so nice to be back downtown again. Now, this whole thing with this massive amounts of snow...so NOT feeling it. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love snow, but I HATE being snowed in...like if the roads were clear I'd be a happy girl. Look, RVA, I did not come all the way home to be stuck in my house for days on end without seeing my friends or anyone...I would've stayed at LC if that was the case because then I would be snowed in with all my friends. So, I would appreciate if you would keep your snow to yourself because I love my friends and I want to drive around and see them. Thank you. :)

FREE!!!

I AM FREE!!! NO MORE EXAMS! NO MORE STUDYING! IT'S OFFICIALLY CHRISTMAS BREAK!!! Now that I got that out of my system...oh wait. IT'S NOT GONE. I'M SO HAPPY. FINALS, YOU CAN KISS MY ARSE! :) But...besides that. I shall depart from Lynchburg tomorrow around 1. Which means, for all of you that are home. If you would like to grace me with your shining face tomorrow at some point please text me. :) Also, I am excited to come home, but super sad at the same time. I hate that. I honestly love it here. And I see these people every single day for HOURS...like HOURS. I feel like I've known some of my friends here for years because we spend so much time together. And I love my room and that it's the party room and everyone comes over all the freaking time. Oh, and did I mention I freaking love my independence. Why can't everything be in one place? Please? Friends, all live by me...not in different states and hours away. Humph. But still stoked to come home because of my fabulous friends and momma, my bed, having a bathroom to myself, my car, and doing all the crazy things we do together. EEP! :D

life.

Isn't it funny how life always has it's way of working out? I was really stressing out last night about my class schedule because I am now MAJORING in Biology! Pretty glad I've finally picked something! I then plan on going and getting my Doctorate in Physical Therapy...watch out....you'll have to call me Dr. Straw! Haha. But my advisor kept canceling on me, so classes were getting filled up and such. So I took matters into my own hands and made my own schedule that had all requirements of my major...a lot of Gen Eds as well. Haha. I figured it out all on my own, and it was pretty stressful. But hey, people here don't call me sassy for nothin! Haha. Anyways, I tweeted last night how I just wanted to cry because I was so stressed. And I had four friends immediately talk to me about it that night. This, my friends, is love. Even though we are miles away, my good ole friends still got my back and care about me. I'd like to thank you for that, because without yall, I don't know what I would do. Also, I finally decided to just give it up to God, and I was a lot less stressed. And of course everything started to flow together so easily. I wish I would've done it sooner, because in all honesty it's the only thing that works. Now that I've done that, I've got crazy exams coming! Eep! Also, please take in my SCHEDULE OF GLORY...and yes, you are allowed to be jealous. ;)

goodness.

College workload, you are kicking my butt right now. In all honesty, you can suck it. On a happier note, I've been able to skype my friends the past few days and have great conversations! :)