I can't wait for summer. I need a break from here...from some people. While others I hate the thought of leaving. I need a break from everything being so hectic. I need a break from trying to live up to expectations. I can't wait to be with the people that love me most, and get me. Maybe I'll have summer love...that will last. I'd kind of love that. I'm not looking though. If it's supposed to happen, it will. Too bad I just can't meet my future husband. That'd make life too easy, right?

bonner leader.

So, I found out a few weeks ago that I got accepted into the Bonner Leader Program. This is where I do 900 hours of community service in two years. Well, it's a lot more than that. It's designed to heighten the overall education students and members receive by asking them to engage in ongoing service work and helping them develop the experience, skills, knowledge and values necessary to make that work meaningful and lasting. (That's what the website says. Haha) But tonight was the first meet and greet kind of deal. I am SO EXCITED to start Bonner next year! I can't wait to do community service all the time. I get the opportunity to change the world every single day. This is what I was made for. To give back to people. I can't wait. They showed this video tonight and it's actually really cool! Stoked on life right now. :)

home group.

Tonight in home groups we watched a video and then got to reflect on some things and got to write down stuff and this is what came about for me. Thought I'd share.

God loves me...

through all my pain, my ability to hide everything with a smile, me pushing away anything and becoming numb to it so I don't have to feel anything at all, feeling like I will never be good enough for anyone, through EVERYTHING. He actually LOVES me. I am number one in His book. Never runner-up, second best. He wants me to deal with things, I was not meant to be strong all the time...He is strong FOR me. I am perfect in His eyes. He will always, always, always, be there. He will never leave me, and He always cares. He is the one person who will always be there. No matter what. No matter how many times I screw up. No matter who else is in His life. He loves me. This is an incredible thing, and I cannot describe how good it feels to know this.